FORBIDDEN CATALOG
None of this should exist, which is why it is sold out.
Dashing Young Man Bassline Repellent
Spray near doorways. Works on hooks, not memories.
$24.04
The Official Aeris Mandrake Apology Coupon
Redeemable for one sincere but confusing explanation.
FREE WITH GUILT
Recirculated Exhale Candle
Smells like mall HVAC and inner weather.
$8.88
Doorway That Says IF...
Installation not included. Exit not included.
$616.00
Novelty Display Burial Kit
For emerging half-buried under fluorescent light.
$31.00
Songwriting Time Constraint Egg Timer
One day. No mercy. No committee.
$20.03